A comment on the previous blog on the SOS holiday program has brought up an issue I wish to discuss. There was a question within the comment on how to make the choice when one decides to host an SOS child for the vacation.
I would like to present a few questions for your reflection. Who is my brother/sister? What is the difference between a house brother/sister and a village brother/sister? What differentiates between a house brother/sister and a village brother/sister?
Personally, I do not make a distinction between the two. My reasoning being that SOS is an extended family, it extends further than the national and continental borders. The SOS philosophy on the family unit enables all mothers to regard the children as their own and from experience; I have seen that any relationship between any members of the SOS family is not based on the house, village, or even the country they come from. How else do you explain how welcome you feel in a village away from home, with a different family who still regard you as one of their own? The uniqueness of the SOS framework enables me to have a home away from home. I know that the village policy of placing guests with particular family works and goes a long way to establish a bond between the visiting SOS child, or even guest and an SOS family. Some of the village fathers go an extra mile to ensure that the visitor has some things in common with the visitor. For example, I visited a village once and I was placed with a family that had children of the same age, attending college as I was and that was exceptional service.
On the village level, I feel that each SOS child is a potential brother or sister. Let me dabble with some statistics to put my point across. Take a village like SOS Nairobi for example, where we have a total of 16 houses. If a child is brought to SOS today, the probability that the child will be placed in my family house is 1/16, a chance which will make him/her my brother or, sister. So, the only reason that any other SOS child is not my house brother/sister is purely administrative, meaning we have no control where the child is placed. I feel this is enough reason to regard and other SOS child as my brother or sister. I use the same argument to explain why marriages between SOS children from the same village should be discouraged, but that is a topic for another day.
To answer the questions that the host should play, I suggest being a mentor for the child will be the best thing to do. Guide them on making career, or personal choices. Listen to their dreams and aspirations. From experience, i think just listening goes a long way. Some of the kids have ideas already, they just need some input on how to go about it. Find more ideas in our previous posts. I am assuming that you are hosting a child who has a relationship with you. I also wish that we could pose the challenge to the village fathers, mothers and educators on what their expectations may be and perhaps we can develop a manual on how to mentor a child. I would also like to ask if anyone has suggestions on what advice, experiences etc. worked for them, or not as they were growing up in the village.
